The Miscreants
by Sarak
Summary: Before the golden trio, Before the lightening scar, Before the Stag and Lily, Before the Marauder's Map, there were four friends, four girls that wreaked havoc on the halls of Hogwarts.
1. Humble Beginnings

**Disclaimer: Sadly, right now, all I own is green nail polish, dirty glasses, and a ticket stub from Superman. (Very good movie by the way! Go check it out!) So don't go thinking that I won the world of Harry Potter, I am simply making some astute guesses of what the past might hold. **

* * *

**Miscreants**

**Chapter 1- Humble Beginnings**

* * *

Before the Gryffindor Golden Trio, there was just a boy with a lightening bolt scar. Before the tell-tale scar, there was a Stag and a Lily. And before the antlers and petals, there were four friends. The Marauders- claimed to be the worst set of troublemakers that Hogwarts has ever seen, followed by the Weasley twins coming in at a close second. Hogwarts had never seen the likes of the Marauders before. Oh, but how wrong the history books can be… For before the infamous Marauders there existed something far worse. There existed another group of four, four girls to be precise. History would remember them for the men they married and the lives they forged. But Hogwarts remembers them as something more. Hogwarts will forever remember the Miscreants.

Whereas the identity of the Marauders was widely known and acknowledges, the Miscreant's identities remain a secret to this very day. Perhaps that is why they have almost faded from memory…turned long ago into myth, and written down as supposed Hogwarts lore. Very few even remember the days that the Miscreants walked the halls of Hogwarts, and fewer know the truly deep impact that the Miscreants left upon the soul of Hogwarts. For it was because of those four girls that Hogwarts changed. The change was subtle, barely noticeable, but it affected generations of students to come. For the soul of Hogwarts resides in one man, a man that found out the secret of the Miscreants, the only man to know the identities of the Miscreants, besides the Miscreants themselves. Unfortunately he was sworn to secrecy by four wide-eyed girls, a pact that he swore he would never break. And to this day, the pact remains true. Perhaps if he had told someone, then the Miscreants wouldn't be on the verge of fading from legend to myth. However, Mr. Albus Dumbledore prides himself on his secret-keeping abilities, an ability that the four teenage girls weren't sure they could trust. But trust they did, for there was no other option. The secrecy vow only came after Albus Dumbledore figured out the secret of the mysterious Miscreants. But that was no small matter at all. Because, after all, who would ever begin to suspect the four brightest bulbs of Ravenclaw?

* * *

_A thousand years or more ago_

_When I was newly sewn _

_I was just a plan black hat _

_Atop a head that shown _

_Gray hairs of old_

_Gryffindor was his name known _

_A dilemma he faced _

_For how was Hogwarts to continue fast-paced _

_When the Founders Four were nothing more that dust and bone?_

_But quickly came a thought_

_And I became a thinking hat _

_To sort those to be taught_

_To shrewd Slytherin go those sly_

_And ambitious to a fault _

_Royal Ravenclaw gets those few _

_who prize knowledge and thought_

_In sweet Hufflepuff good character_

_Hard work and honesty are sought_

_Gryffindor claims the brave _

_Bold courageous lot_

_So I will put you where you need to go_

_Unless Fate says no _

_But no matter where you end up _

_True friends you will find _

_And things to fill your mind_

_So put me upon your ears _

_And I'll find you a spot among your peers!_

"Cahill, Jocelyn." A young man with golden hair and twinkling blue eyes called. Joce was the fourth to be called. Abefont, Billius; Alton, Elisa; Bell, Martin; and Beaufort, Beauregard had already been sorted. A tall girl, well, tall for eleven-year-olds anyways, with dark curly brown hair and mischievous hazel eyes stepped out of the line. She eyes the hat with determination and strode forward confidently. The blue-eyed man smiled as he dropped the hat on her head. This one was a Gryffindor for sure. Joce tapped her foot as she waited for the hat; she had never had much patience.

_ Oh what do we have here? Jocelyn Cahill, hmm? The Minister of Magic's daughter? And a Cahill to boot! But my aren't you tricky. _

Joce resisted the urge to roller here eyes, but as the hat was reading her mind, it didn't go unnoticed.

_ Don't roll your eyes at me young lady! It's unimaginably rude! A lady of your breeding should know better. _The hat chided and Joce rolled her eyes for real this time.

"Oh just put me in Gryffindor and be done with it!" Joce thought at the hat in exasperation. The hat was getting on her nerves.

_ No. I don't believe I will. _The hat said sticking its nose up in the air and smirking. Joce glared at the black material in front of her eyes. This wasn't going according to plan.

"What? Why not?" She asked desperately. The hat sighed.

_ You have spunk…I'll give you that. Oh and you have courage too, but Gryffindor is not right for you! _The hat proclaimed merrily, and Joce fought the urge to gag.

"Do you _have _to rhyme everything? And Gryffindor is right for me! I'll show you!" She said shaking her head in determination.

_ Ambition is a Slytherin trait that you seem to have in abundance, my dear. _The hat said wickedly, secretly enjoying his conversation. It wasn't often that he got someone that would argue with him.

"I am **_not _**a Slytherin!" Joce said hotly.

_ I never said you were, besides, fate has something else in mind for you. _

"Don't tell me it involves Hufflepuff…" Joce groaned.

_ No you are much too lazy to be a Hufflepuff, you have always been smart, and never had to work for anything. But I should put you in Hufflepuff to teach you a lesson. _

"But you won't!" Joce grinned and the hat groaned.

_ Unfortunately, you are right. Alas you are destined for RAVENCLAW! _

Joce took off the hat amid cheers from the blue table. A smile was plastered on her face, but the Transfiguration professor didn't miss the puzzlement in her eyes as she headed for the table as Casanova, Myrtle was sorted into Hufflepuff.

* * *

Adelaide Morrigan eyes the sorting hat warily as she stood by her place in line. She had straight black hair, and normally smiling brown eyes. But at the moment, her eyes were worried. Her best friend in the entire world had been sorted into Ravenclaw. And Jocelyn Eloise Cahill was just not Ravenclaw material, or so Adelaide thought. Joce was a perfect Gryffindor. She was brave, and bold, she always stood up for the underdog, and Joce had a never-fail knack for getting into trouble. Everyone had always known that Joce would go into Gryffindor; there really was no other option. Addi privately thought that Jocelyn wouldn't have faired to bad as a Slytherin, because man could that girl talk her way out of anything. She was a sly as they came. But Addi would have never told Joce this; Jocelyn was firmly against anything that had to do with snakes. Jocelyn had always been smart, Adelaide mused… But she had never craved knowledge like Ravenclaws were supposed to. It just didn't make sense to put her in Ravenclaw. But Adelaide had to face reality… if Joce was a Ravenclaw, then there was no telling where she would end up.

It had always been Addi's and Joce's master plan to end up in Gryffindor together and cause loads of trouble. Well Joce would cause loads of trouble and Addi would sympathize when she came back fuming from a detention. Plus Joce's friends Min and Ev were destined to end up in Gryffindor too, and everything would be perfect. It was practically destiny for them all to be in Gryffindor, plus it was a sure thing. But with Jocelyn stuck in Ravenclaw, the master plan was ruined. Jocelyn was all by herself so far too. Well not totally, Fletcher, Mundungus, and Dodge, Elphias had gone into Ravenclaw too, but so far there weren't any other girls besides Joce. Addi was snapped out of her thoughts as McGonagall, Odearius was sorted into Gryffindor, she grimaced as the far table exploded into cheers. She was next.

The tall Transfiguration professor smiled at the chocolate eyes girl that stepped out of line as she called "Morrigan, Adelaide." She looked a tiny bit frightened as he dropped the sorting hat on her head.

_ Oooh! Another Morrigan! I do love a good challenge, and your sisters did certainly prove to be a challenge! Well lookee here! IT seems as if you had the sorting all worked out in you head. I'll give you some advice, even the best of plans go amiss. And such devotion to your friends! You would make a great Hufflepuff, if I don't say so myself. But you wouldn't really be a bad Gryffindor either. You have true courage, not something that you often see anymore. And if you really wanted to, you wouldn't make a bad Slytherin. You have an ambition that others only dream about. Now where to put you? _The sorting hat mused, shifting through her thoughts. Adelaide listened patiently, but finally decided that it was better to ask, then to suffer 7 years in a house without Jocelyn.

"What about Ravenclaw? Couldn't I go in there, Mr. Hat, sir?" Adelaide asked politely, remembering her mother's lessons. It was always better to be polite; people will be more inclined to listen to you that way.

_ And just why would you want to be in Ravenclaw, Miss Morrigan? You are certainly smart enough, but I doubt you would enjoy studying as the rest of that house does. _The hat asked, slyly probing for more information.

"Because of Jocelyn. You see, she is my very best friend. And begging your pardon, but she isn't much for studying either, and I don't think she would fit in. Plus there aren't any other girls in Ravenclaw as of yet, and Jocelyn would be terribly lonely. So would I sir, I couldn't very well abandon my best friend! What kind of person would I be if I didn't at least try to be put in Ravenclaw?" Adelaide explained desperately hoping that the hat would see her point.

_ I'll say it again; you would make an amazing Hufflepuff. But unfortunately Fate has other plans. Merlin help me for putting a Hufflepuff in RAVENCLAW!_

Adelaide Morrigan broke into a wide grin as she ran for the blue table where Jocelyn Cahill was cheering the loudest of all. The master plan wasn't totally ruined after all. Now if only Ev and Min could somehow end up in Ravenclaw, then it would be pure and slightly crazy bliss.

* * *

Evelyn Prewitt stood between her identical twin brother Jonas, and his best friend Andy Potter. She was trying to watch the sorting, but it was somewhat difficult as Jonas and Andy were discussing the likelihood of getting into Gryffindor with Ode McGonagall and Noah Jones, who they had met on the train. Ev clenched her fists into balls in irritation. Minerva Stanton, who had been her best friend for almost forever, well her best friend besides Addi and Joce, rolled her eyes at the two boys from her place next to Andy.

Andy and Min were practically brother and sister. They even looked like twins! But there were really only second cousins, barely related in the wizarding world. However, Min's mum and Andy's dad had always been closer than cousins, so Andy and Min grew up right alongside each other. And as Andy and Jonas had decided early on in life that they were going to be best friends, Min and Ev had been forced together until they too had a friendship to rival Jonas and Andy's.

But that didn't stop blonde-haired, blue-eyed Evelyn Prewitt from worrying. Jocelyn Cahill, her partner in crime since they were two, had gone into Ravenclaw. And Joce Cahill was as much a Ravenclaw as Andy Potter was a Slytherin. Joce was a Gryffindor to the bone, or so Ev and Min thought. The three of them had decided early on that they wanted to be Gryffindor Girls, and Addi had naturally been added into the plan when she moved here from France when there were all six. However, Ev had always thought that Addi had always been more of a Hufflepuff type, simply because she was so sweet. And Min was a Ravenclaw if there ever was one, you could barely pull her away from the library, and she was way too into the rulebook for Joce and Ev's liking. But Addi had gone into Ravenclaw too. It just didn't fit, Ev thought stubbornly. Well at least Addi and Joce were together. Should she dare to hope to end up in Ravenclaw too? Evelyn was shoved roughly out of her thoughts as Jonas pushed her out of the line of first years. She twirled to face him angrily.

"What was that for?" She asked hotly, and Jonas smirked at her.

"Maybe due to the fact that Professor Dumbledore has called your name twice already." Jonas rolled his eyes as the stupidity of his sister. Evelyn glared at him as she walked stubbornly up to the hat. Brothers could be so mean sometimes. Honestly!

_ Oh I wouldn't worry about your brother, Miss Prewitt. You'll find that you like him soon enough. _

"Who said that?" Ev asked as she opened her eyes and tried to look around, seeing nothing but the dark inside of the hat.

_ Why me! The Sorting Hat of course! _The hat proclaimed proudly.

"Oh… Can I ask you a question, Mr. Hat?" Ev asked sweetly.

_ Well you just did, but of couse, ask away. _

"What are you thinking? Are you sure you can even thing properly? Didn't you even look at Jocelyn and Adelaide's personality?Joce is no more a Ravenclaw then a Potter is a Slytherin!" Ev ranted some of her worries out on the hat. She had a habit of doing that, just bottling everything up until it came out in full force. But usually it was Jonas who suffered her wrath, and now she had probably pissed off the hat, so she definitely wasn't going to be in Ravenclaw at this rate. These were the times when she hated her temper.

_ Oh I have my reasons, and you would do well to not doubt my judgment. Not all Potters are Gryffindors; I think the time will come when we could very well see a descendent of Godric in the Slytherin house. Just you wait. But I believe you will be surprised to know that you, yourself, Miss Prewitt are not a Gryffindor either. Fate has other plans in store for you. _The hat explained. Joce rolled her eyes irritably.

"So it's fate fault when I end up having to explain to my mother exactly why I ended up in Slytherin?"

_ Your brain is quick enough, I'm sure you'd find a good reason. But you mustn't worry too much longer. For you won't be a Slytherin, but a RAVENCLAW! _

Ev frowned in confusion as the hat was pulled off her head, but instantly broke out into a grin as she spotted Joce and Adel beckoning her over to the cheering Ravenclaw table. She turned and smirked at her twin was gaping at her, right alongside Andy Potter. With a wink, Min pushed both boys forward, snapping them out of their reverie. Ev spotted the worried look on her brother's face as he headed for the hat. Undoubtedly he thought he was going to end up in Ravenclaw too.

His fears were cured when he was quickly sorted into Gryffindor with Andy Potter not a second behind. Jonas and Andy quickly sat next to their new found friends from the train, Noah Jones and Ode McGonagall. After Romulus, Regan was sorted into Slytherin, the young transfiguration called Min's name. Ev, Joce, and Addi sent an encouraging smile her way as Min took a deep calming breath and succumbed to the darkness of the Sorting Hat falling over her eyes.

* * *

_ Ah… What do we have here? Oh no! Not another Potter! Even if you are just a Potter cousin! One of you is more than enough. My, my will the teachers have their hands full this year. Well Potter's, even distant ones, always go to Gry- _

"Wait!" Min screamed in her head. "Supreme, overlord, hat, sir, are you sure? Take a closer look in my head and you'll find that my Potter side hasn't corrupted me yet. As a matter of fact, I generally play by the book. The rulebook that is!" Min added hopefully.

_ Well you do seem to have the studious side down. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to put you in Rav- Wait! Well aren't you a devious one! You almost tricked me! _The hat gasped.

"A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do." Min shrugged her shoulders as she gave a sly smile.

_ How very Slytherin of you! _The hat sniffed disdainfully.

"I told you I wasn't _all_ Potter." Min reminded him, as if that explained everything.

_ Well Gryffindor would be a good place for you, but it seems as if Fate has other plans. Fourth time today too. It seems as if she has something big planned. Oh! And when you start looking for a name I suggest Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief Makers. But maybe not… Miscreants has a nice ring to it, don't you think? _

"You're crazy." Min shook her head at the hat.

_ I prefer the term 'mentally deranged' thank you very much! _That hat said dryly. _I don't envy them your sarcasm and wit in RAVENCLAW! _

Min was still somewhat puzzled over the odd hat's remarks, when said hat was yanked forcibly from her head. Picking herself up, the newest Ravenclaw saw three gleeful faces beckoning her over to the Ravenclaw table. The three girls barely paid attention to the rest of the sorting, as it passed by in a flash, ending with a black haired boy named Zambini, Bode joining their table.

* * *

The feast was, well, just an average feast as far as Hogwarts is concerned and pretty uneventful. Well it was uneventful if you forgot the part where the new caretaker, Apollyon Pringle, stood up and yelled that he'd personally slay the first student set off one of those 'new fangled dungthingies'. This statement was followed by a shower of pumpkin juice from Professor Dumbledore who was laughing just a bit too vigorously. Addi swore she saw him wink at two tall red headed boys sitting at the Gryffindor table, two boys that looked to be suspiciously plotting on how to make the new caretaker's life miserable. But Adelaide was known for her conspiracy theories so none of the other three girls really believed her. But if you ignored all of that drama, then the feast was perfectly uneventful. Well, almost uneventful.

Everyone knows that Andrew Potter can't sit for a minute without causing, or plotting to cause some kind of trouble. And as he had finished eating, he was left with next to nothing to do. And it doesn't take a bored eleven year old boy long to decide that it is high time to flick a pea at his favorite cousin, Minerva, who happened to be sitting right next to Jocelyn Cahill. Unfortunately, eleven year old boys don't have very good aim. So he of course missed and hit a very irritable Jocelyn Cahill in the head, splattering pea-guts all over her hair. But instead of doing the logical, logical meaning starting a food fight like Mundungus Fletcher wanted her to, Jocelyn glared. And boy does Joce Cahill have a nasty glare; no eleven year old boy could stand up to that under pressure. Minerva gleefully exclaimed that it was the first time she had seen Andy cower to anybody other then his mother. However, stubborn Gryffindors aren't prone to cowering, so it wasn't too long before Andy was glaring right back. Jocelyn smirked as she surveyed her three friends.

"Revenge." She said, and four pairs of eyes glinted with mischief as they clinked their classes. Dodge rolled his eyes and Dung, as Addi had so nicknamed him, went back to picking at his potatoes mumbling about the waste of a perfectly good scope goat for a food fight. Joce soon reverted to glaring at Andy. Minerva leaned across the table to whisper to Ev and Addi.

"I'd say Joce has made Andy her new target." Min whispered to the two.

"More like 'self-proclaimed-enemy'." Addie said scoffing. Evelyn giggled at the two before catching their eye.

"I dunno… Min, Addi, it looks like love at first sight to me." Ev said. This was too much for the already giggling girls. Min snorted as Addi fell off the bench. Evelyn grinned smugly as Joce glanced puzzled at the two laughing maniacs. Jocelyn threw Ev a questioning eyebrow, and Ev just replied with a confused shrug. Jocelyn shrugged and went back to discussing the record number of detentions with Grape Gatsby, a 6th year prefect.

* * *

Up at the head table, a young man with twinkling blue eyes popped a chocolate frog into his mouth as he eyed the four Ravenclaw girls with interest. All four had taken a particularly long time to be sorted, and had sported almost identical looks of confusion as they headed over to the blue table. Even stranger was the fact that they were the only four girls to end up in Ravenclaw this year, while every other house had at least ten girls. Add this to the fact that the four seemed to have already bonded and Albus Dumbledore was seriously thinking of resigning his post as head of Ravenclaw. It wasn't that four eleven year old girls were anything to be frightened of, because surely four girls such as the ones sitting at the blue table were anything but scary to a man that had faced Grindewald and a charmed goat. However, there was something to be said for one of those four girls. For she had the power to evoke panic and wide chaos in the noble heads of Wizengamot. Jocelyn Cahill was widely regarded by everyone in Wizengamot as a menace, or at the very least a terror inspiring mischief maker. One could only imagine the sort of trouble a girl with a wand, and three partners in crime could cause in the halls of Hogwarts. The young Transfiguration Master frowned, but whether it was from the thought of how much horror a harmless eleven year old could cause, or the fact that the chocolate frog he had just consumed gave an unpleasant lurch in his stomach, we may never know. But we do know that Albus Dumbledore crosses chocolate frogs off the list for his viable favorite candy.

So far the list had only two items, Drooble's Best Blowing gum and Chocolate Frogs. Both of which were in the process of being crossed off. The gum incident had ended rather traumatically with Albus needing a haircut. But rest assured that the Professor had not yet given up his quest for the best candy of all time. It was of Albus's opinion that every decent defender of justice, truth, light, and all that was good in the world, needed a favorite candy. That stupid Batman character probably had a favorite candy, and Batman was half dark! So of course Albus, the new defender of light, needed a favorite candy. And maybe a cape too. You couldn't be a good superhero without a cape. But he would need to work on that dastardly billowing effect. It just wasn't working out for him. Billowing took a lot more concentration that you'd think. With one last frown, Albus went back to his mashed potatoes, oblivious to the glaring contest between the Ravenclaw and Gryffindor tables.

* * *

**Author's Note: Well this was just an idea that I've been toying with for a while. There are a few recognizable characters, but I can guarantee that more will pop up along the way, and of course some life altering events will come to pass, such as finding one's favorite candy, the journey from man to ghost, and the evolution of cantankerous caretakers at a certain school of witchcraft and wizardry. This story takes place in the late 1940s or early 1950s, just a year or two after the defeat of Grindewald. Comments, questions, and criticism are always appreciated! Happy Reading! **

**-Sarak**


	2. Goldilocks and the Three Bears

**Disclaimer: My possessions don't include Harry Potter, a convertible, or the legal rights to Star Wars. Have fun!**

* * *

**The Miscreants!**

**Chapter 2- Goldilocks and the Three Bears**

* * *

That night found the young Transfiguration Professor frowning at a piece of paper. Albus Dumbledore was sitting at his desk decked out in his full pajama outfit. Pinstriped woolen socks covered his feet, while a bright green stocking cap covered his head, fluffy bunny slippers were in a pile near the desk, next to a bathrobe covered in rubber ducks. A steaming cup of hot chocolate sat next to the paper, stuffed to the top with marshmallows, however it was rapidly growing cold. Dumbledore glanced at the steam wafting in the air and sighed… thinking of candy was so difficult. Well, maybe it was only difficult because Albus had never been allowed to indulge in his sweet tooth before now. Sadly, Albus was very inexperienced in the world of candy. 

Albus glanced around the room, spotting a frayed hat sitting on a worn stool. The same hat that Albus argued with when he was but a little first year, the same hat that had a mysterious quality about it that just seemed to demand attention. The longer Albus stared at the hat, the more he felt a desire to try it on. Looking carefully around the room, to make sure no one was watching, Albus crept out of his chair and towards the hat. It was no surprise to find the hat atop his head several seconds later.

_Ah… Mr. Dumbledore, a pleasure to pick your brain yet again. I see that you are suffering from some great unanswered question… May I ask what ails you? _

Albus quickly thought of explaining his candy problem to a hat and decided that it was a bit too strange, even for him.

"Uh… Nothing really, well nothing important. I was just drawn to you for some reason tonight. I can't really explain it."

_You have been called! _The hat exclaimed excitedly. _I must remember to inform Armando of this splendid news! It's truly exciting. _

"Called for what?"

_Nothing. _The hat said quickly, all earlier excitement gone. _But I see you have been pondering the newest editions to the Ravenclaw house. _The hat sounded like it was trying to change the subject. It was pretty obvious, but Albus was curious about the new Ravenclaws as well.

"Yes, I was. I found it rather odd as all four girls took an incredible amount of time to be sorted."

_Well those four were a rather feisty bunch. They weren't too pleased with some of my earlier decisions. Why that Minerva Cahill! She went practically Slytherin on me as she tried to get into Ravenclaw. __But she was destined for Ravenclaw in the end. Yes… Fate planned that little thing out. _

"Fate? What would fate want with four little girls?"

_That's classified information. But I will give you a bit of advice. Fate plans everything for a reason. The reason might not become apparent for quite some time, but it is there nonetheless. They should be interesting to watch. _

"Interesting how?" Dumbledore's teaching side stepped though.

_Oh nothing. Not interesting, definitely not interesting. _The hat said hastily. Albus thought the hat sounded suspiciously like a liar, but he couldn't say for sure. _You might want to watch those Gryffindor boys though. They are more than capable of mischief. The Slytherins this year aren't a particularly nasty bunch, slyer than anything. They won't start many fights, but don't underestimate them. They will be sneaky with their revenge, but they aren't as bigoted as the usual bunch of purebloods are. There is an unusually large number of Hufflepuffs this year, very sweet kids though. You should put them with the Slytherins… it'll even them out. There might be an oncoming feud between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, but nothing you can't handle. And whatever you do, remember that an idle mind is trouble waiting to happen. _

"The students won't be happy with you if they hear you are responsible for more homework." Albus said. He managed not to roll his eyes as he thought of a pair of red-heads he had once known. They were the worst troublemakers you'd ever meet. But after getting to know them, it was plain to see that they possessed an absolutely brilliant mind, although they were a bit lazy and prone to boredom. They didn't put their brain power to much use besides thinking up new pranks. It was no surprise that the two had opened a joke shop after finishing school. The two were more commonly known as Gambol and Japes.

_Now usually, I don't tell anybody but the headmaster about the new first years, but you seem like a nice fellow. I still remember sorting you. You had a most interesting mind to poke around in… you still do in fact. But I would definitely advise you to take blood-pops off of your list of candy to try. They were around when I was alive, and I bet they haven't changed the recipe. They were nasty then and I'd bet they'd be nasty now. Unless you are a vampire… but I don't see you doing the whole bloody fang bit, so the blood pops are safe. _

"I still have to try them. I have to try everything. What if I find out that I really like them? How else will I get a proper sampling of the candy out there? I could be missing out on some really good candy."

_You could trust other people's advice? _The hat suggested.

"You are a hat! Not a person! And you would do well to remember that!" Albus sniffed disdainfully.

_Well at least I don't act like an immature three year old. _The hat said as Albus sent him a rather vivid image of sticking out his tongue. The grunted before bursting out in shock. _You don't really mean to try Cockroach Clusters do you! _

"Why else would they be on my list? Albus said, oblivious to the fact that Cockroach Clusters, do in fact, contain live Cockroaches. That would be a nasty surprise later. If the sorting hat had a head, then he would have shaken it in disgust. As such, he did not, and had to settle for a loud cough that sounded suspiciously like 'lunatic'. Not that Albus was pointing any fingers. One man's lunatic was another man's genius. He just hadn't found anyone to call him a genius yet, hero yes, but genius, not yet. Maybe it was time to take ol' Saint Nick up on his offer.

_Yes… Do that and forget about the Cockroaches. Nicolas is a good enough guy. We had some very interesting chats when he was younger. But I haven't talked to him in years. Tell him Pinks says hi. He'll understand. Oh… one more thing, Al, may I call you Al? Make sure to try out some of Honeyduke's Chocolate. They do have the best around, except for the Cockroach Cluster bit. But now I must insist that you take me off for my long awaited nap. You don't know how tiring it is to sort though eleven-year-old minds. _

Albus yawned himself into a sleepy trance as he removed the already snoring hat from his head and wandered off to bed. The list could wait until tomorrow. As the young professor nodded off to sleep, a few floors up in a certain Ravenclaw tower, a light in one window still shown brightly in the night. Inside, four girls were slyly plotting Revenge.

* * *

"Well it _has _to be embarrassing." Ev supplied nastily. 

"Oh yes." Min grinned in agreement.

"Embarrassing? Oh come on ladies! Where is your sense of compassion? All he did was flick food at Joce. Its not like he did something utterly scandalous, like turn her hair pink." Addi chided the girls while Joce faked vomiting at the word pink. Addi was always one for Hamarabbi's Code. The whole 'Eye for an Eye, Tooth for a Tooth thing.'

"You, more than anyone, should know that I have no sense of compassion as far as Andy Potter is concerned. Besides, he's probably plotting my demise at this very moment. If we don't retaliate now, we may never get the chance." Jocelyn explained to the group as Addi rolled her eyes.

"Plotting your demise? Come on Joce, no eleven year old boy knows how to plot." Addi said, trying to make Joce see reason.

"Adelaide, Potter and myself hate each other. People who hate each other are enemies. And enemies plot each other's demise and then they retaliate. It's a proven cycle, it's lasted for near about forever, who am I to go against the scared cycle of Enemies?" Joce said.

"So do we get just for Andy, or all four?" Joce, Min and Ev gaped at Addi who had just suggested getting all four boys in one blow. Addi shrugged at her friends.

"Well if you can't beat them, you may as well join them." She grinned at her friends as they collapsed into a fit of giggles.

"So…I'm really into this blue hair thing. What do you guys think?" Joce said as the giggles subsided.

"Jocelyn, honey, colored hair is way overdone. Do you really want to be accused of unoriginality?" Ev said.

"Plus, blue hair would be obvious. I mean, blue is one of our house colors, and who else besides us in Ravenclaw would want to die Potter's hair blue?" Addi said.

"Wait!" Everybody turned to look at Min, who had just spoken. "Are we going to get in trouble for this?" Ev and Joce stared at her blankly.

"Well duh. That's half the fun! Maybe we can break the detention record?" Joce said, her eyes shining.

"Detention?" Addi asked in a small voice while Ev nodded in agreement with Joce.

"My parents will kill me if I get detention." Addi said, sinking onto the bed.

"It won't be so bad." Ev said.

"That's not what I heard." Min said, terror in her eyes. "Sandy Tinen told me that they hang you from your ankles with chains in the dungeons until you faint!" Joce rolled her eyes.

"Sandy Tinen is a gossip, and a liar at that. This is a school! They can't hang kids in the dungeon! Besides, do you really think that I'd be so careless as to get caught?" Joce asked min with puppy dog eyes.

"Well no…But-" Min said as Evelyn interrupted her.

"But Joce! Isn't half the funs letting everyone know you did it?" Ev asked.

"Yeah." Joce said glumly looking dejected.

"Wait!" Addi said from the corner. "WE could have a code name or an alias or whatever you call it. Then we could leave our name, but no one could prove it was really us. So we couldn't get into any trouble. It'd be the practical joke of a lifetime? All three girls squealed in agreement.

"But what do we call ourselves?" All three girls frowned.

"Umm… JAME?" Joce asked.

"Why JAME? It sounds funny." Ev asked.

"Duh! It's our initials!" Joce explained, Min rolled her eyes.

"It sounds too much like James for one, and two, its way to obvious. Who wouldn't figure that one out?" Min said logically.

"Well I thought it was good." Joce mumbled under her breath. "And I am so totally naming my kid James."

"What about the Fantastic Four?" Addi suggested.

"Too Mugglish. It sounds like something the Muggles would call some superhero." Ev said.

"Not that you don't have a major crush on Superman yourself, Ev." Ev blushed bright red at Min's teasing.

"Well he is cute." She said.

"Oh come on. The guy's allergic to a green rock. Could you get any lamer?" Joce asked.

"Yes." Addi giggled. "Sneezleby Suthers." Joce and Addi burst out into laughter as Min and Ev watched in confusion.

"Who's Sneesleby Suthers?" Min asked as the laughing died down, only to have it come back in full force. Addi finally took pity on the two and explained the story.

"Well my sister Mercedes is a 5th year. She's in Gryffindor, yah know. But there is this really geeky boy in Hufflepuff in her year. So one day, she took pity on him, and partnered up with him in Herbology. It was only after she did this that she learned that Sneezleby has secretly been harboring a major love for her. So he basically started stalking her. He wrote her love letters, he tried to slip some love potion into her pumpkin juice, and he even paid a galleon for some hair from her hairbrush. Mercedes was burning the letters he sent this summer, and she let us read them. Boy, they had the cheesiest lines you've ever heard. The poor guy. Mer vowed never to talk to him again. She almost switched schools this year cuz of him… Well she wanted to, but Fate, a.k.a. my parents, stepped in." Joce and Ev both started laughing again at the conclusion of her story, Min, however, looked throughtful.

"What's up Min? Thinking about Sneezleby Suthers?" Joce asked giving Min a sly wink.

"Just thinking about something the sorting hat said. Did you find him odd at all? But first, what do toy guys think of the Miscreants as our name?" The other three girls' eyes widened.

"It's perfect!" Ev squealed, and Joce and Addi nodded in agreement.

"It needs a subtitle." Joce said.

"A subtitle?" Ev raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah! Everybody has one. We don't even have to use it. It's more just the fact that we have it, if you know what I mean. It'll make us ten times cooler." Joce explained.

"Oh." Ev said politely.

"What about 'Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief Makers of Past, Present, and Future?" Min suggested again.

"It's perfect!" Joce said in excitement.

"It'll do." Ev said dully.

"How are we going to aid Magical Mischief Makers of the Past?" Addi asked, frowning in concentration.

"Don't sweat it Adds, we'll figure it out." Joce said.

"Where did you come up with those anyways Min?" Ev sounded curious.

"The Sorting Hat. Did you think he was a little bit strange?"

"Oh yes, but not nearly as strange as…" Joce started and not minutes late, the four were in stitches yet again. It looked like they would be laughing the night away.

* * *

The next morning…. 

"Jocelyn, honey, dearie, sweetie, can we _please _go eat and save your diabolical revenge for lunch?" Ev asked, holding back a yawn. It was breakfast and Joce had called a stakeout for revenge of her arch rival and hated enemy, also known as Andrew Potter, a part of the dreaded Gryffindor Four as Addi had so aptly named them. They had been the first to leave the Ravenclaw Tower, and that was an hour ago, Min, Addi and Ev's enthusiasm had long ago been replaced with growling stomachs and hearty yawns. Joce looked to be the only one fully interested and fully awake.

"Yeah! We could eat and comeback?" Addi tried not to look excited, but failed miserably.

"Besides! I am starving." Min added. Joce glared at her three hopeful friends and their faces fell instantly.

"I'll take that as a no then." Min sniffed disdainfully.

"Minerva! We can't just abandon out post! We mustn't let those scumbags get the better of us. We are the Miscreants of Hogwarts! We will fight for Freedom, Truth, Justice and a Good Prank anywhere. That is our vow!" Jocelyn got a little carried away in her zeal, and as the others were trying hard not to laugh, all four missed the arrival of a certain professor.

"Hello Ladies. Having a nice morning?" The four girls jumped.

"P..P..Professor Dumbledore, sir!" Addi exclaimed fearfully.

"We weren't doing anything against the rules! I swear!" Min also looked bugged out.

"I was just about to comment on how lovely it is to see four young girls such as yourselves having a nice heart to heart." The blonde teacher explained.

"Oh." Min and Addi said together, feeling strangely stupid.

"In a broom cupboard?" Ev raised a speculative eyebrow.

"Why yes Miss. Prewitt. This one is rather cozy don't you think?"

"Um… sure sir. Nice and… uh… roomy!"

"Well I'd best be getting to breakfast." The professor turned to leave. "Oh and Miss Cahill?" Joce turned from where she had been stashing the diabolical revenge.

"Yes, sir?"

"You might need to aim a little bit to the left." Joce and the others were left gaping as he walked away. Ev was the first to recover.

"Golly! That was neat!"

"At least we didn't get busted." Min said.

"Maybe he was talking about something else?" Addi suggested.

"How did he bloody know we were here?" Joce asked out loud.

"JOCELYN ELSPETH VICTORIA MADELIN CAHILL! What has your mother told you about cussing?" Addi railed on her friend, who didn't even look up.

"And what have _I _told you about shouting in the middle of Diabolical Revenge?"

Min and Evelyn hid their giggles as Addi seemed to ponder the thought. A look of comprehension suddenly dawned on her face.

"Oh right! Rule 457." She said suddenly, Joce nodded in satisfaction and went back to what she was doing.

"Huh?" Min looked confused, and Addi once again took the liberty of explaining.

"Well Min, you see, Joce discovered quite early on that I am pretty incapable of the diabolical revenge bit-"

"It's very true." Joce interrupted as she carefully aimed the diabolical revenge just a little bit to the left. Addi shot her a glare, but Joce just shrugged her shoulder.

"Well as I was saying! The whole prank thing really isn't my bag. So I accidentally got us caught. So Joce's mum, who had grown tired of punishing us by this point, gave us a rather unique punishment. Instead of making us apologize to everyone on Wizengamot like she usually does; however, that's usually a disaster anyways. Mrs. Cahill sent us to the library to write down every rule we could think of. Unfortunately, Mrs. Cahill didn't specify what type of rules, so Joce wrote a book of 2,013 Rules to Rule Breaking with added diagrams and ideas for clarification. The look on Mrs. Cahill's face was priceless! Joce's dad told us that she laughed for hours afterward, but we weren't supposed to know that. We were also told that the book was burned, but we had my sister Harley make a copy for us. Plus we found it on the 5th floor broom closet while we were searching for Christmas Presents last year." Addi explained to Min and Ev who were laughing their lungs out. Joce threw them both a glare that just made them laugh harder. It didn't take too long for all four girls to be laughing. However, Joce looked up just in time to see four boys in Gryffindor robes saunter down the stairs. An evil smile settled on her face.

"It's go time." She whispered and the diabolical revenge was set into motion.

* * *

Looking back, the Miscreants really set off their career with a bang. But that just the beginning. Jocelyn called a humble start, and Ev was inclined to agree. Adelaide was sort of indifferent, and Minerva was just worried that the Transfiguration Professor had caught on already. Alas, Joce, Ev and Min were all wrong. The beginning really wasn't humble and the Transfiguration Professor had other thing on his mind. He was contemplating if acid pops could truly burn a hole through your tongue. That was why he didn't really notice when four Gryffindor boys came into the great hall sporting identical looks of confusion as to why they were suddenly dressed up as Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Nor did Albus Dumbledore notice the four Ravenclaws armed with a camera and film, lots and lots of film.

* * *

"Potter!" Joce exclaimed joyfully as she walked into the sniggering Great Hall. "Who knew that you'd make such a lovely girl?" She pinched on of his cheeks as Min snapped a picture. 

"I'm sure Aunty Hannah would just love to capture this moment in the Potter Family Scrap Book!" Min smiled evilly at her panicking cousin.

"Oh, but Min darling," Ev smiled at her brother. "You must get a group shot. Merlin knows that my mum could do with a good laugh."

"Say Cheese." Addi said gleefully as Min snapped the camera again. Another satisfying click of the camera later and Min and Ev had their blackmail and Jocelyn had vengeance.

"You'll pay for this Cahill!" Andrew Potter seethed underneath his breath.

"Oh… Now Andy, you don't really want to go blaming Joce for something that you can't even prove now would you?" Addi smiled sweetly at him before the four girls turned to walk away. When they had reached the first table, Addi turned back to yell at the boys.

"Oh, and Andrew!" The boy-turned-Goldilocks perked up his head to listen. "Pink really isn't your color!" Andrew Potter and Co. glared at the retreating backs of the four giggling girls.

"This means war." Andy seethed to the three bears, known mainly as Noah, Jonas, and Ode.

"Chill out Andy. Joce is like a professional at this sorta thing. Your chances of beating her are 5,362:1." Ode McGonagall lobbied the angry boy.

"Never tell me the odds." Andy muttered. Jonas motioned Noah and Ode in closer.

"Andy has a nasty little habit of never backing away from a challenge, but he especially doesn't like challenges orchestrated by Jocelyn Cahill." Jonas explained.

"It's probably cuz she's a girl and his pride is at stake." Ode guessed.

"Or maybe he's secretly in love with her?" Noah suggested, and Jonas gave him a wink.

"Yeah… but it's probably due to Andy's hormonal intake. Switching sexes can't be good for his testosterone level." Jonas said, rather uncommitted. Andy turned and glared at the three bears, all of whom were laughing rather outrageously.

"Oh sure! Laugh it up Fuzzball! At least I'm not a primitive species!" Andy shot back, also dissolving into laughter.

"Wait! I thought girls were a primitive species!" Ode said with a grin, noting Andy's current state.

"Burn!" Noah said, giving Ode a high-five. Andy pondered the sentence before sticking out his hand.

"I can't contest the truth of that statement… Truce?" He grinned as they shook hands, and went to breakfast, plotting their revenge.

* * *

**Author's Note: I hope yah enjoyed it. Kudos to anybody who can pick out my two Star Wars quotes and who said them and in what movie! Happy Reading.  
-Sarak**


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